Fanfic: Mairg Darab Galar an Gradh (Love Is A Sad Sickness) (1/1)

[smokingmirror]

Title: Mairg Darab Galar an Gradh (Love Is A Sad Sickness)
Author: Avarice
Rating: R (violence)
Pairing: -
Spoilers: -
Summary: Spike dreams.
Word Count: 1392
Date First Posted: -
Date Revised - 12-05-2011
Beta: -
Awards: -
Notes: Companion piece to Codladh Buanan Bas (Death Is Lasting Sleep). The first had been so successful and worked so well, I attempted Spike's dream. It was a good effort, but I don't think it ever captured the magic and beautiful ease of Angel's dream.
Feedback: always welcome, as is constructive criticism.

Mairg darab galar an grádh,

gibé fath fá n-abraim é

is deacair sgarthain re a pháirt;

truagh an cás a bhfuilim féin.

///////////////////////////////

Love is a sad sickness --

When speaking to him, whatever the cause,

it is a hardship to separate after time together.

Pity my own blood's case.

-- Isibeul ní Mhic Cailín

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder."

//i'm sorry//

\\no you're not\\

Spike fell to his knees, the bullwhip dropping from his hands, his eyes never leaving the figure of the man chained to the ceiling of the dining room. Blood ran in rivers down his back, soaking into his torn shirt and jacket, creating a macabre Rorschach inkblot of flesh, gore and ruined material. It formed a pool of redness on the expensive carpet that the guests did well to step around.

The dark-haired vampire watching the show walked over from across the room -- politely excusing himself to guests -- and ran a finger down the torn back. The man flinched, but otherwise remained silent.

"Hmmm," Angelus murmured, taking the cigar out of his mouth to suck on his index finger thoughtfully, "not quite enough fear, boys... could do with some more." He bent down and retrieved the whip, bringing the handle up underneath the man's chin. "Care to oblige?"

The man's breathing was rasping and hollow. Blood stained his brown hair black, and made it stick to his face. One eye was swollen shut, but the other watched impassively, a dull and nearly lifeless blue.

"Well?" Angelus pressed, a glimmer of annoyance in his eyes.

Nothing.

The dark-haired vampire snarled and threw the whip back down to Spike.

"Again," he instructed simply, inhaling the strong scent of tobacco in the air. Spike stood slowly, wrapping the whip around his hand deliberately. He looked at everyone but his sire and the man chained to the roof and began again.

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder!"

//i-it didn't have to be this way//

\\of course it did\\

Spike stopped again, doubt flitting across his features. To reassure himself, he brought a hand up to feel the ridges on his forehead.

"Why d'you stop, boy?" Angelus asked testily. He scrutinised Spike carefully before his voice took on that familiar condescending tutorial sire tone. "You know you must complete this."

"I realise."

"I can't help you all the way."

"I understand."

"You must finish what I have started."

"I know."

Angelus walked around the trembling body to stand in front of him. The vampire goaded him to meet his eyes. When he refused, the demon lost his temper and struck out, backhanding William viciously.

"Look at me and know Death!" He hissed through razor sharp teeth.

"Hey!" Spike interjected. Angelus ignored him, grabbing the mortal by the throat. William choked, his good eye rolling back into his head slightly.

"When I stand under the street lamp, you will be on the fringe of light. When I dance in the hall, you are pricked by the rose, and when I want you to look at me, you will look!"

Spike threw himself in between the two. "Back off.... sire." His angry outburst dropped to a respectful tone in the end. He faced Angelus. "I can do this."

"Really?" The vampire raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "I have seen much evidence to the contrary..." Angelus held his hand out casually, and snared Drusilla by the waist.

"Then you've been looking at the wrong things," Spike bit out.

"Have I?" he asked, pulling the vampiress close.

The blond could barely conceal his fury. "I've worn the long night like a cloak. I let the essence flow like a river, and ichor has rained down from Heaven, and come up from Hell. I have caused and witnessed the destruction of innocence and hope and salvation so don't bloody well stand there and tell me I can't do this!"

Angelus' mouth curled up in a smirk, and he held his hands up in mock-defeat. "Then have at it, boy. I tire of your hesitance." Spike clenched the whip tightly, muscles working beneath his jaw. He cracked the whip near William's ear with ease, watching with satisfaction when the man flinched away. And it began anew.

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!"

Angelus smiled beatifically and shooed Dru away to another part of the party. "That's it. Do not rest, do not tire, do not release. It is not enough to kill. Killing is too kind. To break him, and allow him to live inside you where his shame and grief are overwhelming... makes me feel giddy. I don't even have to chain mine up anymore." The dark-haired vampire looked affectionately to a quivering mass in the corner next to the antique lamp. "Isn't that right, Liam?" The man just sobbed quietly.

Spike looked over to Liam's broken body, quelling the sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach. Curling his lip up, he lashed out at William.

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!!"

"My boy does lovely work," Dru clapped happily.

"Yeah, he sure is taking charge," Buffy agreed, taking the tray of shortbread from Cecily to offer it to the other blond woman. "Want some, Harm?"

"No thanks, I'm only going for low-fat meals now." she commented, grabbing a thin, gangly man and sinking her fangs into his neck without effort.

"My boy," Dru sighed again, watching her lover work, "my Angel."

William didn't make a sound anymore. He gasped and retched and sobbed before, but now... nothing. Angelus walked forward once again, running a finger over the man's swollen lip. "There there, precious," he cooed, "it will all be over soon..." The vampire leant in close and bit at the air in front of William's jugular, sensing the thready pulse. "... but not soon enough for you." His eyes flit from William's to Spike's, giving the non-verbal command.

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!"

//i wish this could end//

\\it can\\

Spike hesitated, the whip frozen above his head.

//how//

\\just wait and see\\

Angelus raised an eyebrow at the delay, stating his order again.

"Harder."

Spike did nothing.

The dark-haired vampire scowled, his voice raising in volume.

"Harder!"

Still, Spike did not comply.

Angelus' face distorted in anger, voice screeching the commands.

"Harder! Harder!! HARDER!!"

(thwack)

The older vampire's eyes rolled back into his head and he sank to the floor, out cold.

"Liam?"

Liam was barely able to stand, and covered in bruises and lacerations. Tear tracks were still visible on his dirty cheeks, and he clenched the broken stand of the lamp in his hands.

"Angel," he corrected, his voice cracking from under-use, "it's Angel, now."

Drusilla ran over from the corner, pushing people out of the way, overturning tables. She crouched down beside Angelus, pulling his head into her lap.

"Bad boy. Spike let Daddy get hurt again."

"But baby, I didn't even-"

Dru's eyes flamed. "Of course you did. It's your fault, Spike.”

"Yeah, Spike." Buffy helped Dru lift Angelus' body onto the couch. "God, you always mess things up, don't you?"

"Yeah," Harmony echoed.

"Like I haven't heard that before..." Spike rolled his eyes and turned to William. The blond reached out hesitantly, touching the man's bonds, which fell away with his contact. The sable-haired man stretched gingerly, and faced the vampire.

//is that what I was waiting for?//

The mortal nodded and sat down on the sofa next to the unconscious Angelus. He looked down at the vampire almost affectionately and leant forward, placing a soft kiss on his lips.

\\i don't blame him, you know\\

//I'd have thought you would//

\\well, it's your fault as much as it is his, and I don't hold it against you\\

//oh// Spike sat down in between Buffy and the propped up body of his sire. He looked around. //you're not going to leave anytime soon, are you?//

William smirked and shook his head in unison with Harmony, Buffy, Angel, Dru and Cecily.

Spike sighed and leant on his fist. "Well, at least when Angelus comes to we can have a four on four game of footy..."

"I'm on Spikey's team!" Harmony announced.

Try as he might, the blond vampire couldn't block out William's soft laughter echoing through his mind.

~finis

Mairg darab galar an grádh,

gibé fath fá n-abraim é

is deacair sgarthain re a pháirt;

truagh an cás a bhfuilim féin.

///////////////////////////////

Love is a sad sickness --

When speaking to him, whatever the cause,

it is a hardship to separate after time together.

Pity my own blood's case.

-- Isibeul ní Mhic Cailín

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder."

//i'm sorry//

\\no you're not\\

Spike fell to his knees, the bullwhip dropping from his hands, his eyes never leaving the figure of the man chained to the ceiling of the dining room. Blood ran in rivers down his back, soaking into his torn shirt and jacket, creating a macabre Rorschach inkblot of flesh, gore and ruined material. It formed a pool of redness on the expensive carpet that the guests did well to step around.

The dark-haired vampire watching the show walked over from across the room -- politely excusing himself to guests -- and ran a finger down the torn back. The man flinched, but otherwise remained silent.

"Hmmm," Angelus murmured, taking the cigar out of his mouth to suck on his index finger thoughtfully, "not quite enough fear, boys... could do with some more." He bent down and retrieved the whip, bringing the handle up underneath the man's chin. "Care to oblige?"

The man's breathing was rasping and hollow. Blood stained his brown hair black, and made it stick to his face. One eye was swollen shut, but the other watched impassively, a dull and nearly lifeless blue.

"Well?" Angelus pressed, a glimmer of annoyance in his eyes.

Nothing.

The dark-haired vampire snarled and threw the whip back down to Spike.

"Again," he instructed simply, inhaling the strong scent of tobacco in the air. Spike stood slowly, wrapping the whip around his hand deliberately. He looked at everyone but his sire and the man chained to the roof and began again.

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder!"

//i-it didn't have to be this way//

\\of course it did\\

Spike stopped again, doubt flitting across his features. To reassure himself, he brought a hand up to feel the ridges on his forehead.

"Why d'you stop, boy?" Angelus asked testily. He scrutinised Spike carefully before his voice took on that familiar condescending tutorial sire tone. "You know you must complete this."

"I realise."

"I can't help you all the way."

"I understand."

"You must finish what I have started."

"I know."

Angelus walked around the trembling body to stand in front of him. The vampire goaded him to meet his eyes. When he refused, the demon lost his temper and struck out, backhanding William viciously.

"Look at me and know Death!" He hissed through razor sharp teeth.

"Hey!" Spike interjected. Angelus ignored him, grabbing the mortal by the throat. William choked, his good eye rolling back into his head slightly.

"When I stand under the street lamp, you will be on the fringe of light. When I dance in the hall, you are pricked by the rose, and when I want you to look at me, you will look!"

Spike threw himself in between the two. "Back off.... sire." His angry outburst dropped to a respectful tone in the end. He faced Angelus. "I can do this."

"Really?" The vampire raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "I have seen much evidence to the contrary..." Angelus held his hand out casually, and snared Drusilla by the waist.

"Then you've been looking at the wrong things," Spike bit out.

"Have I?" he asked, pulling the vampiress close.

The blond could barely conceal his fury. "I've worn the long night like a cloak. I let the essence flow like a river, and ichor has rained down from Heaven, and come up from Hell. I have caused and witnessed the destruction of innocence and hope and salvation so don't bloody well stand there and tell me I can't do this!"

Angelus' mouth curled up in a smirk, and he held his hands up in mock-defeat. "Then have at it, boy. I tire of your hesitance." Spike clenched the whip tightly, muscles working beneath his jaw. He cracked the whip near William's ear with ease, watching with satisfaction when the man flinched away. And it began anew.

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!"

Angelus smiled beatifically and shooed Dru away to another part of the party. "That's it. Do not rest, do not tire, do not release. It is not enough to kill. Killing is too kind. To break him, and allow him to live inside you where his shame and grief are overwhelming... makes me feel giddy. I don't even have to chain mine up anymore." The dark-haired vampire looked affectionately to a quivering mass in the corner next to the antique lamp. "Isn't that right, Liam?" The man just sobbed quietly.

Spike looked over to Liam's broken body, quelling the sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach. Curling his lip up, he lashed out at William.

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!!"

"My boy does lovely work," Dru clapped happily.

"Yeah, he sure is taking charge," Buffy agreed, taking the tray of shortbread from Cecily to offer it to the other blond woman. "Want some, Harm?"

"No thanks, I'm only going for low-fat meals now." she commented, grabbing a thin, gangly man and sinking her fangs into his neck without effort.

"My boy," Dru sighed again, watching her lover work, "my Angel."

William didn't make a sound anymore. He gasped and retched and sobbed before, but now... nothing. Angelus walked forward once again, running a finger over the man's swollen lip. "There there, precious," he cooed, "it will all be over soon..." The vampire leant in close and bit at the air in front of William's jugular, sensing the thready pulse. "... but not soon enough for you." His eyes flit from William's to Spike's, giving the non-verbal command.

(thwack)

"Harder."

(thwack)

"Harder!"

(thwack)

"Harder!"

//i wish this could end//

\\it can\\

Spike hesitated, the whip frozen above his head.

//how//

\\just wait and see\\

Angelus raised an eyebrow at the delay, stating his order again.

"Harder."

Spike did nothing.

The dark-haired vampire scowled, his voice raising in volume.

"Harder!"

Still, Spike did not comply.

Angelus' face distorted in anger, voice screeching the commands.

"Harder! Harder!! HARDER!!"

(thwack)

The older vampire's eyes rolled back into his head and he sank to the floor, out cold.

"Liam?"

Liam was barely able to stand, and covered in bruises and lacerations. Tear tracks were still visible on his dirty cheeks, and he clenched the broken stand of the lamp in his hands.

"Angel," he corrected, his voice cracking from under-use, "it's Angel, now."

Drusilla ran over from the corner, pushing people out of the way, overturning tables. She crouched down beside Angelus, pulling his head into her lap.

"Bad boy. Spike let Daddy get hurt again."

"But baby, I didn't even-"

Dru's eyes flamed. "Of course you did. It's your fault, Spike.”

"Yeah, Spike." Buffy helped Dru lift Angelus' body onto the couch. "God, you always mess things up, don't you?"

"Yeah," Harmony echoed.

"Like I haven't heard that before..." Spike rolled his eyes and turned to William. The blond reached out hesitantly, touching the man's bonds, which fell away with his contact. The sable-haired man stretched gingerly, and faced the vampire.

//is that what I was waiting for?//

The mortal nodded and sat down on the sofa next to the unconscious Angelus. He looked down at the vampire almost affectionately and leant forward, placing a soft kiss on his lips.

\\i don't blame him, you know\\

//I'd have thought you would//

\\well, it's your fault as much as it is his, and I don't hold it against you\\

//oh// Spike sat down in between Buffy and the propped up body of his sire. He looked around. //you're not going to leave anytime soon, are you?//

William smirked and shook his head in unison with Harmony, Buffy, Angel, Dru and Cecily.

Spike sighed and leant on his fist. "Well, at least when Angelus comes to we can have a four on four game of footy..."

"I'm on Spikey's team!" Harmony announced.

Try as he might, the blond vampire couldn't block out William's soft laughter echoing through his mind.

~finis